Have you ever had a revelation so powerful that it knocks the wind out of you? I did on the drive home a few days back. I had to pull over for a couple of minutes just to write it down and pray about it. I asked God why I was struggling so much with certain sins. He said, “Maybe it’s because you are trying to recreate that feeling you had when you first asked for forgiveness, because that is where you first felt like you were worth anything, and you’ve forgotten that Jesus said ‘It is finished’ before He died on the cross to pay for every sin you will ever commit.”
Ouch.
Paul discusses his ongoing struggle with sin in Romans 7:15-20. Here are the verses:
Romans 7:15-20 (15)For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. (16)Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. (17)So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. (18)For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. (19)For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. (20)Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.(ESV)
Every experience that is repeated is an attempt to recreate or improve upon that first time. Nothing in this life can compare to those first moments of true salvation. Maturity in faith is coming to a place where one understands that the truth of salvation is that even those first glorious moments of true freedom and peace will pale in comparison to eternity with our Father in heaven. There is no need to try to recreate that first moment and trying to do so is ultimately an insult to the very blood that removed our sins. We are trying to recreate for ourselves the moment of salvation which turns our salvation into a works theology.
This isn’t to say that this is the only reason why anybody struggles with sin. This is just one of the reasons that I, personally, continue to struggle.






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